Everyone around me seems to be talking about weddings…or showing me their huge sparklers, or talking about wedding dresses, or even getting married, including the two weddings of friends this Saturday just past.

(Although at the one I attended, one of the groom’s friends took his underwear off at the table half way through the meal – yes he was wearing a kilt – and threw it at the top table to the delight of the bride. Oh and one of the groomsmen’s girlfriends was so drunk she could be audibly heard swearing throughout the elderly bride’s father’s speech. Now that is a Scottish wedding with class)

Anyways, people panic when they realised I’ve just got divorced. This is despite the fact that most of them know that I’m about to move in with The Boy (1 month to go!) and that my marriage ended 8 years ago. It seems I am not allowed back on the list of people who should be leaping for the bouquet list just yet. That as a recent divorcee I don’t deserve the chance to get married again (or even the romance of getting engaged), that I have to wait out a suitable period of mourning before I can get back on the waiting for a ring train. That if I was lucky enough to get married once, I shouldn’t consider a 2^nd.

 (Or maybe it’s actually because I’ve decided that as a divorcee I am allowed to consider wearing a black ‘rock chic style’ wedding dress especially as The Boy wants to wear a black 21^st Century style kilt. Look, we’d look hot, not like Goths at all. Honest, stop looking at me like that)

To be honest, I didn’t think id ever be at this point where I was thinking that a 2^nd marriage would be a good thing. I’d spent so long hating the fact that once I got divorced I could get proposed to that I didn’t do it the whole time I was with the LTE. (…and then I moan when he proposed to someone else as soon as we broke up, yes, I know how stupid I sound). But I am. I think finally i’ve grown up and accepted that instead of my marriage failure being my fault, that my first foray into the wedded world was doomed from the start.

Many people marry for the wrong reasons, among them 1) to overcome loneliness, 2) to escape an unhappy parental home, 3) because they think that everyone is expected to marry, 4) because only “losers” who can’t find someone to marry stay single, 5) out of a need to parent, or be parented by another person, 6) because they got pregnant, 7) because “we fell in love,”…

Or like us, decided to get hitched after drinking shots 4 hours, 3 weeks after we got together. Ahem. Look I felt like a celebrity, looking back it was more white trash than being divorced at 30. Anyways, I’ve come to believe in this, more than anything recently

A good marriage is at least 80 percent good luck in finding the right person at the right time. The rest is trust.

…and the first step is trusting the fact that you will find someone.